Brownie

So I haven't seen Brownie in like about a month and a half, maybe more. And I really haven't spoken to him in about a week. so hes on the phone right now. I mean like right now, while I'm typing. And I'm getting one hell of a crick in my neck typing this and making noises like I'm listening to him...

He talking to me about lumber for his deck, like I give a shit. Bout how he just found out that the wood was cheaper and more uniform at Home Depot. Hello! And they have a price garuntee dipshit.. I mean is that really what you talk to a woman you're having sex with about? I mean if you're married sure why not, but I cant remember the last time that he and I did something together that didn't involve a bedroom. Can't even recall the last meal we shared, but I'm pretty sure that it wasn't someplace that I would have choosen for a date for two semi successful people in their 30s (ok so I'm like less than a month away from being thirty) Like Fridays or some shit. Nothing wrong with Fridays mind you but how about a little effort fuckhead!

"when am I gonna get you away for the weekend babygirl?" Ah, the trip. He brings it up every so often when he thinks I'm losing intrest. I'm really not the type of woman to be swayed by something like a trip, especially when hes putting price restrictions on me. "oh babygirl i dont want to spend that much. why dont we try a place off the boardwalk." (he wants to go to Atlantic City and if you are thinking "Hmm you sure he's not using your info to bring the next broad?" you should know that I'm a suspicious bitch and didn't give him all the details) The place he suggested was soooo off the boardwalk that it wasn't even in Atlantic City anymore. "Its only like a 15 minute drive to the casinos..." That was in like August shortly after the last time that I tried to plan a trip for us.

So he wants to know what I'm doing this weekend, and I tell him that I have some shopping and shit to do with Mommy on Saturday (we take a monthly trip to Costco and Target for the big shit and run to the stupidmarket for fruits and veggies) and hes all "Whats at Costco that you gotta go there with you mother?" "Paper towels, toilet paper, steaks, you've never been to Costco?" (I'm being obtuse in case you haven't caught on) "No, I've been to Costco, seems like your always going to Costco." "You have a problem with Costco?" He laughs, "No, I dont have a problem with Costco..." I'm tuning out cause I'm really losing intrest in his ass now. If I want to go to Costco every fucking day, its not any of your fucking business. I only have to explain myself to a select few, and you sir, are not one of them. So I'm back to making noises like I'm listening to him, correcting the mistakes I made typing the first part of this. And then I pick up on the words, you come me sunday. "Uh, yeah I'll try, ok I'll talk to you later. Bye!" I'm a terrible liar even when I'm not distracted but what I cant figure out why I didn't just tell him no.

I've gone about a year without having sex, well at least not with another person, so I know it not the thought of losing di that made me hesitate. Plus he seems to think that I answer to him, which is not coo at all. He's a jumpoff at best, and they dont get shit but a nut. And he bores me to tears lately, so why couldn't I just say no?