The Way I Are...

I was a floater in high school. Not really surprising considering that I bore easily and the damn school only had 87 people. My class was the second largest, coming in with a whooping 23 kids. And just in case you still haven't gotten it let me spell it out. e i g h t y s e v e n k i d s i n t h e e n t i r e s c h o o l n i n t h t o t w e l f t h. Got it?

So I hung out with everybody. The Theatre kids were always in character. I did Waiting for Godot, God by Woody Allen, and the Mad Woman of Chaillot, pretty impressive works for high school. And see there is some basis for me saying that I'm gonna be the next Gabby Union, only this time with talent (*ba doom bish!) But it still did not prepare me for the nasty ass Theater Major that would be my roommate freshman year in college - used tampons and pads do not go in the wastepaper basket you crab! (I was in that room for less than a month - the stupid RA was like "Why don't you try talking to her? Maybe she doesn't know..." 18 years old and she don't already know that people don't want to see her bloody rags?! - sorry that was gross for me too)

I played trumpet in the Jazz band and I've been know to improvise on a sax or trombone. My name earned me alot of cool points with the music set. I also sang 2nd Soprano in the school chorus - I even had a couple of solos. I can still give one hell of a Yankee Yell (I was gonna put Rebel Yell there but that would have been all kinds a wrong for a black girl from NYC) and I probably have one of the most melodic Rat Rage Screams in New York.

I hung out with the Asian kids (girls really there were only like 2 Asian guys, one who was kinda hot but very pervy), the school was so small the cool ones and the geeky ones had no choice but to hang out together. In exchange for editing their papers, I had all the Calculus tutors a girl could ever want and a hook up for my pager. With them I learned how to tell when an Asian woman is cursing you out without having to know the language, that I can eat Jellyfish (but why would I want to when its like chewing on rubberbands), and they used to always tell me when people were talking about me (couldn't fart in that school without the Asian chicks knowing!)

I played volleyball, basketball, and softball so I had an in with the jocks. Specially since I used to fill in for the guys basketball team's score keeper. They didn't let me do that very often cause I would usually bust into giggles at the patheticness (that's not really a word, but it should be!) that was our boys basketball team. Girls team totally kicked ass though! We were always in the semi-finals or finals for our league while I was playing. And did I mention that I was a starter freshman year (it would be more impressive if I hadn't just told you that there was only 87 kids in the school) and that I've played ever position except point guard. Yes, my 5'7" ass did play center and did the jump ball gainst some big burly bitches!

I hung out with the gays and lesbians, well actually I had 2 openly gay teachers and one suspected lesbian (the school was founded by a communist lesbian so lets just say tolerance was more than a catch phrase.) Plus I had two friends, one male and one female who came out shortly after graduation (well actually he was a year ahead of us so he came out and my homegirl did too. duh you idiots, like I didn't know! Shit I think I knew before they did.) And from them I learned that gay or lesbian does not mean sex addict. Sheet if I had a quarter for everytime some dowdy dog lookin chick thought my homegirl was checking her out in the locker room just because she was gay. Dudes don't want you, you really think a woman would? (by the by we all lived in the same neighborhood and took the train home together not that I need to justify why we hung together.) They also taught me how to pitch pennies at the third rail (I know I know totally troublesome right but you'll be happy to know I was never able to get the penny to make sparks...)

I was also in student government, gave peer tours to visiting students, was the effing prom committee (u bunch of lazy shits! I wasn't even gonna go to that crap) and was in the photo club (and I pretty sure that I still remember how to process my own film and make my own prints.)