Cupcakes and Babies All Night Long!*

*Lady Shay said that to me.  She and PrettyBlack say the damndest things!  I'm still waiting for the right time to use the red velvet line...

• I thought of a time when straight men say cock instead of dick - cockblocking
• PB, not to get into your Tupac vs. Notorious BIG debate, but I just realized that part of the reason why I love Biggie is cause of the way he could tell a story in a rhyme.  I admire the same skill in Slick Rick and Nas
• Personally, I think the greatest rapper alive is Snoop Dogg.  longevity, adaptability, success, and a sick flow
• I did not buy the last two Jay-Z albums, in fact I dont even have bootleg copies
• I am not a fan of Ashanti, I repeat - I am not a fan of Ashanti BUT I can't get enough of that single she's got out now, The Way That I Love You
• I love my dentist - seriously.  I recommend him to anyone that I can.  I'm pretty sure that I've told you all this before but I'm not sure that I told you that Mommy has started seeing my dentist as well.  The first time that I went in after she had been there, the whole office gushed about what a nice lady my mom was.  Then I go in to see Dr. R and he's like, "You and your mom have the exact same jaw structure.  It's amazing!"  The strangest things excite people
• and speaking of teeth, Gutz (Cousin T & SuperSlags play sister) brought her man to MonkeyGirl's recital.  He's aight I guess but dude laughed at something and I got to see all inside his mouth.  It was scary to say the least.  I'm not a fan of people who show you their tonsels when they laugh but did I really need to know that he has a wicked cavity on the inside of one of his front teeth?!?  I think the fuck not
• I think I forgot to mention that one of my interviews was with a super hottie.  I know that they say that imagining your audience naked is a good way to overcome fear of speaking in public.  Well it did help me to relax but all sort of dirty wicked naughty hot thoughts were running through my head.  Good thing I'm one hell of a multi tasker.  About 6'2", nice broad shoulders, thin waist, and dressed.  I swear I heard a "ding!" when he flashed the pearly whites.  Something about pretty brown skin and nice white teeth.  I'm guessing he was Indian or Bangladeshi.  Whatever the fuck he was, it sure made a pretty pretty picture.
• I think I mentioned that I went to a house party with Cousin T. I'm never really quite sure what to make of house parties.  I was pretty sure that this one was gonna turn into one of those ones where there are friends, family, food, drinks, and a card game or two.  The fact that the host mother was there was an indicator.  But she didn't stay long and then the pigeons arrived.  Now when I say pigeon, I'm talking about the chicks that you can find in any city coast to coast.  There about as common in NYC as pigeons.  Sometimes the come in different colors, some may have a slightly different thing going on for them, they might even be domesticated, but they're still just flying rats.  Dirty, common, rude, loud, obnoxious, occasionally useful, sometimes diseased and every fucking where.  
  
• speaking of house party pigeons, I was wearing my Skinny Bitch t-shirt.  The writing on the shirt looks like twigs so I paired it with some skinny Seven jeans (For All Mankind) and some Minnetonka pocahantas boots (tall flat lace up suede boots with a suede fringe at the top.)  This chick comes up to me all drunk, talkinbout "I know right! They all call me skinny bitch at my job, and I'm like FuckYeahIAm!  Right?!?  Them bitches are just jealous they can't look like us!"  Uh, ewwwwww!  First of all, not to be all T-Rexy and shit but fuck it, she wasn't really all that skinny.  Second of all, I think I already said ewwww!  The shirt said Skinny Bitch, not Sloppy Drunk Bitch.
• and since I'm already talking about the party, PYT was there (damn, it took me a minute to remember what I've been calling the damn boy since I haven't been calling the damn boy) and I acted very immaturely.  I ignored his ass all night, that is I tried to.  His boy, who I'm cool with tried to give me shit about it.  PYT was cool for a minute, but thats all he lasted, a minute.  Ok, so maybe it was more like 7...

Trouble's Corn Chowder

this is in honor of LadyShay, without whom I would have never had the idea.

I can never leave a recipe alone.  Just. Can't. Do. It.  I have to add something, change it and some way, claim it as my own.  So when Lady Shay posted a link to this recipe for Corn Chowder, I had to do something to it.  I couldn't resist.  For one thing, I was out of chicken stock.  And vegetable stock.  And I'm not really a fan of cream of corn soup, although I actually do have that in my kitchen cupboard.  So I searched for other recipes.  I found ones with evaporated milk.  And half and half.  And lobster.  And crab.  And bacon.  Wait a minute that bacon one has a corn stock base, and I have fresh corn.  But I didn't want to use bacon fat to fry my onions.  And I wanted to put red peppers in it.  And carrots, I love carrots.  And I didn't want to make that much soup, cause its just me and Mommy.  So a recipe was born, makes about 3 servings...

2 Ears Sweet Corn

1/4 onion (I used red and yellow cuase there were two small pieces left over in the fridge, I also prefer small onion pieces, so cut how you like them)

2 cloves of fresh garlic, diced

2 small potatoes, peeled and cut into small cubes

3/4 cup of milk

just enough olive oil to coat the bottom of a small skillet

a nice fat pat of butter, almost a tablespoon

6 baby carrots, cut into bite sized pieces 

a little section of fresh red pepper, seeds removed, cut into small pieces

seasoning to taste

sharp cheddar cheese (optional)

grilled chicken breast (optional)

Cut kernels from cobs, set aside.  Break cobs into 1/3s and place into what I like to think of as a small soup pot aka the pot I use to boil pasta in.  Add a little more than 1 1/2 cups of water.  Season to taste.  (I used a little salt, some cayanne pepper, garlic and onion powders) Bring to a boil then reduce to a simmer and cook for 20 minutes to make corn stock.  Remove the cobs, make sure there is no silk in the stock.  (The original recipe said to drain the stock, but I just used a slotted spoon to make sure there was no corn silk...)

While the stock is simmering, warm a small skillet over a low fire, coat the bottom with a little olive oil, and melt your pat of butter.  Add chopped onion, garlic, and red pepper, cook for about 5 minutes or until the yellow onion is translucent.  

Add the potatoes, carrots, milk, and onion mixture to the corn stock.  Taste and season according to preference.  (I added some thyme, rosemary, and a little more salt - I tend to be very light on the salt usually, thats why I needed more)  Bring to a simmer and stir to prevent foam from forming (its hard to skim with the kernels of corn)  Cook until potatoes are tender.  Taste and adjust seasonings if necessary.

I cut up a piece of grilled chicken breast and mixed it in with the chowder.  Then I shaved a nice little cheesy mound of Cracker Barrel Extra Sharp Cheese on top.  It went great with the biscuits I made from scratch yesterday...

Yeeeeeoooooouuuuuccchh!

I SLAMMED MY POINTER FINGER IN A FUCKING CAR DOOR!  And I was drunk enough that I didn't really feel it.  But it was gross looking.  So I cleaned it and slapped a bandaid on it.  I don't know, I've always had a thing for bandaids.  When I was little I used to sneak them out of the medicine cabinet and put them on myself.  In the morning, I used to take the off before Mommy or Daddy found them.  But of course they always did when the changed my sheets.  Anyway now my finger is starting to throb.  And its my right finger too!  I need that finger!  And that means I won't be able to change my polish for a while cause the gash is right under my nail.  At least it's good polish, Chanel.  I don't care what anyone says, that shit is worth the money.  Goes on smoother, dries a lil quicker, last a lil longer.  If you can afford it try it.  Shit, I got distracted!  What the fuck was this lil rant about again?  Oh yes, my fucking pointer finger and how I fucked it up.  I deserve some chocolate for my pain....

I drank the effing milk!!!

so I wander into Mommy's apartment this morning and she's making pancakes.  Mmmmm, Mommy makes the best pancakes!  So I'm hungry.  But then she says to me, "Why didn't you tell me the milk was bad"  And I'm all "the milk was bad?!?"  and she's all "yeah it was thick as shit, you didn't notice?"

So now I feel sick cause I put it in my tea! (I don't drink coffee, I'm hyper enough as it is! and it gives me a tummy ache)  I frothed it so I didn't notice that it was bad.  Which is really strange cause I'm usually the one that is like, "this smells funny" two days before everyone else.  And even though it was over 24 hours ago, I swear I'm about to be sick!  So I haven't eaten yet today.

I think I'll go eat a Sweetie

Thank You Afro!

For sticking up for me against the harpies!  

Anners and Daners Are Big Stinky Brontosauruses!

Huh

Apparently I'm a member of Team Celine, so if any of you are interested in Celine Dion tickets, holla at your girl! You know I got that hotness! Owwww

And I think "Don't Forget to Hide A Pickle In The Solstice Tree" has got to be one of the best titles that I've come up with, if I might say so myself. I think thats going to be the name of my novel...

And TRexy is still making me giggle like a loon.

I had to take the train with high school kids this morning and for some reason that always makes me nervous. By the by Afro, I was right, that was my train!

Wish me luck, the NY Mega Millions Jackpot is now 96 million dollars! That's 96 million dollars! Ah ha ha ha! (sorry still channeling the Count) I promise to buy you all something (or at least come and visit you all) if I win. Hmmm, I'm thinking TypHo estates in Canada, Hawaii, Turkey, Barbados, Seychelles, Belize or Ecuador, Thailand, Italy, and New Zealand.

For some reason this morning I said to Persian Royalty, "I need tea and sympathy!" he cracked up and told me thats the name of a restaurant. And don't worry I don't really need the sympathy, I'm in an exceptionally good mood! Which is hella strange considering...

Apparently I have some new alter egos

Say hello to DumbRexy and TRexy.  They may be popping up from time to time to cause Trouble!  (that cracks me up, I said cause Trouble!)

And thank Anners, she brought out the catty mean non eater in me.